Wednesday, January 23, 2008

unluckily...

An unlucky day…

Today is a holiday which means I can finally stay at home, sleeping and relaxing. However my family and I have had to go out to buy stuffs. On the way home , when I already reached my residential area, I was carrying heavy things that we bought and walking. Suddenly I fell down =.=” I simply don’t know why and how it happened. But who cares, all these don’t matter as much as the wound does. My hands and legs bleeded, with rashes all over the shoulder, elbow, wrist till the palm and knee.




T_T it was so painful. I kept telling myself not to cry like a small kid because it is a public area, though’ it’s just outside my house. I really didn’t drop a tear, I held the tears till I reached home and poured the antiseptics onto the wounds. At the particular moment, I feel like screaming OhMyFreakingGod =.=” my eyes were then glassy… Sigh, why was I so clumsy at that moment, did I look at the road while walking?

And what about tomorrow? I will be having latihan sukan tomorrow which means I have to wear short sleeves PJ T-shirt. T_T I don’t wish to let people see the ugly reddish rashes. Sigh after taking bath, I put on the antiseptics again, just to clean it completely and kill the bacteria on it. Sadly I tried writing but I couldn’t because the wound is right on the right palm of mine. And this had disallowed me to even hold something hard.

T_T spoilt my mood of the day…
======================================================

I wished to quit the job I am having now. I remembered how we competed just to get the job but now I really feel like letting go of it. Well, all sorts of reasons have made me to let go it and dislike them as much as some people do. >.< but at the same time, I also feel sad to let go jobs that I really like to do. 7 : 3, so to let go or not? Really tough decision to be made…

[I am living better now, thanks]

Sunday, January 20, 2008

20 01 08

So it is now already the third week of school. Everything is going on smoothly, and works are getting more and more. This year, I have got more extra co-curricular jobs such as edi board, photography job and lib stuff. And unbelievably, I have been chosen to be the secretary of Bendahara [=.="really thanks to Ms. Vun]. And because of this, I gotta skip tuition just to attend the latihan sukan on every Tues and Thurs. OmG why this year both guys and girls must go on both days? Chamz.. And I can't imagine those reports that I gotta write soon T_T.

Sadly, I have been so busy that I have totally forgotten bout the 'thing'. LoL i told him about this and he said that got improvement in me and that's a good thing since time can fade it so easily. But actually I wish to take a breath, sit bac kand relax. I start hating tuition and school for it is so tiring and causing me so exhausted, and with all those meetings and activities which cause my schedule to be sooooo packed...

Anyway, I am still glad that I have moved on, and rejected his request of finding the 'someone' LOL =.=" Again, I should say people do grow up as time flies...all in a blink of eyes...

-I am still me-

Thursday, January 10, 2008

10 jan 08

Now I had experienced Form4 life for a week and I’m totally exhausted =.=” I really don’t know why the students of my class are so scary that they are holding the books with them and doing exercises throughout the day. How can one survives with such a lifestyle? Maybe others can, but not me T_T. And 4G, yea it’s a ‘G’ class again, I kinda dislike it [I have no idea why some people are so excited over it] because I feel kinda bored with the people liao, they are just the same faces in 3G except for a few people. And unbelievably there is only 5 guys here, and they are all boring guys = = no offence =X. Never mind, forget bout the word ‘guy’ since it is not everything. I don’t want to think bout the past, moving in present is always the best. And I don’t wish to get the awful experiences anymore, there’s still a long journey to go in future. Gosh, what the heck I am typing here, alright now back to the main topic lolz.

Besides school, I also attended tuition classes. Haha, people must be saying that I am mad for going to tuition classes for 10 subjects xD. No marh, since it is free so mai attend lorh. Kakaz, but still I gotta go there for many days in a week. It’s really tiring, but somehow it is good for keeping myself busy everyday to stop myself from thinking bout unhappy and unnecessary stuffs. Sigh, why can’t I just let it go leh? I still want to care bout this, to think bout it over and over again, to keep everything in my heart. I dare not to accept any of the truths again. Anyway I will get used to the tiredness soon, since Form4 life is a sudden change to me.

I miss you, I really do.
It had been too long that we barely have a chat. There are a lot of people around me who can actually replace you anytime. But none of them is able to replace your place in my heart. If there’s really misunderstandings between us, can’t we just solve it? Can’t we just confront each other to explain everything? Maybe you might be thinking the opposite thing of mine, and the fact is that I don’t wish to guess anymore, so face it.

Being a 16-year-old girl, I don’t wish to be a cry baby anymore =.=” nor I am going to let my tears flow out because of this. I feel like I am entering a new small stage of life--- facing 11 SPM subjects, and 10 tuition subjects. Lolz, can I really go through such a hectic life these two years? I don’t know, but I wish I can.

I promised myself that I could live better than in 2007,
And I must believe in it and make sure that my promise is fulfilled.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

2008 jan 1

1 月 1 日 雨

Hmm at first I thought of blogging in Chinese but too bad my NJStar isn't working =.=" so fine leave it, and I shall use English then...

~*^*~
On this very first day of 2008, I do hope things could change, at least slightly different from last year. Being sick is really a sad thing, coz’ can’t join them for countdown. Even if I could get there, I might still miss the fun T_T since I could barely speak a word *sigh why sore throat till so cham de?*. Okie nevermind, after all it is just a celebration which I could actually enjoy it yearly =D.

School is going to reopen soon, and I will be busy with stuffs again. So I might not be able to online, not to say blogging anymore. =.=”so this will be the last post for the holiday [will update again if there’s chance + time]. I remembered last year I was still worrying if I have time for him, if I can still meet him weekly, or fortnightly, and if bla bla bla… But now nobody needs to do so anymore. Yeapz, I’m free =D weee… I actually used quite few days time to think bout it. And now perhaps I am still thinking if I could get any explanation from you, and to tell you how much I’d wish to make it clear between me and you. But since it is the past and I have started to forget about this, so I guess there’s no such need anymore. Perhaps letting it be is always the best option among all. Finally I have decided to let it go *sigh you knew I am always uncertain in making decisions rite?* lol. And bout the thingy I have bought, I have decided not to collect it since it is not important anymore. And wasting RM50 is not a big deal after all *maybe?* >.< accept the truth..now… So I even threw away the receipt to make sure that I won't collect it. Forever not.

Thanks 2008, for bringing everything into the past, and I shall always step forward but not looking backwards. Thanks 2008 for fading away everything between us. Thanks 2008 for bringing him away from me. I assure myself that I could live better than in 2007.

[Bye, 07’ ♥]

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