30 June, 2009


So unfair!

How comes others read,
"Nombor KP anda tidak terdapat dalam senarai yang terpilih"

But mine is,
"Tahniah dan Selamat Maju Jaya"

Oh is this your way of "congratulating" me?
Spellman was the one who told me bout this oh-so-unwelcomed news,
and once I got home, I checked by myself and
OMG I found out that this is not a joke!

If you would like to check if you're as lucky as me,
do click the link below:

-Semakan Peserta Khidmat Negara-

Seriously if I say I am so glad and looking forward to this event,
I am OBVIOUSLY lying to you and myself!

Most of them who went to NS told me that

attending National Service was so FUN!

They learnt lots of things there,
and it is really an exhilarating lifetime experience of theirs!

Oh that's what everyone tells me when they know that I got selected.
But you are not me, you won't understand.

You wouldn't understand my plan of going for the January intake in college.
You wouldn't know how much this type of people like ME would suffer in camps.
I couldn't survive,
Sigh I am worried,
I am afraid that I really couldn’t survive through this =(((

I Googled this topic,
and found these photographs.

I am NOT going to allow myself being attired like this.
I couldn't get rid of the girlish clothes I had.

I almost died

while I was in the PBSM marching group during the competition.
I remembered exactly how I felt.

It was exhausting, and an unhappy experience with people.

This is the worst part of everything.
JustinQ told me how much he enjoyed the 3-months-training,
and he missed the moments.

I knew he loved it, because he was so outgoing.

But I am not.
I could not mix around well with people.
I am not able to do physical activities like this,
because I am suck at it.

I seriously very dumb in sports,
I am EXTREMELY poor at it T_T!!
I never know how much would I hurt myself by doing sports

I can only solve Additional Mathematics equations,
do the working for Physics questions,
balance Chemistry's equations.
I can do NOTHING other than these.

I am crying,
I promise myself not to shed a tear,
but I can't.

This is something that bothers my mind so much
more than any other better things!

I am soon gonna hate you, counselling teacher.
I hate you for putting my name into the list.
I hate you for submitting the list to the government.

I hate you for making me weep!

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